Reflections on time
And a celebration of womanhood
I don’t remember when or why it started - I was never particularly religious - but every year since childhood I’ve given up something for Lent, committing to the abstinence period with steadfast determination (I would have sailed through the marshmallow test). I’d like to say this self-discipline at an early age showed a maturity beyond my years but really it was just a bet I made with myself, rewarded with the nirvana of gorging post deprivation.
Having tested the strength of my willpower against standard vices - chocolate, booze, every form of fried potato, this year I’ve turned more towards self improvement. Along with incorporating healthier daily habits I’ve put a ban on using my phone on public transport - no podcasts, no NYT Games App, retraining my head to look up instead of down. A small sacrifice but in London that’s a lot of hours clocked. And baby steps, it’s not just a guilty pleasure, it’s an addiction!
One of the better known champions of living a more analog life is Zadie Smith, who has never owned a smart phone. Not because she sees herself as being above it all, rather she knows she’s just as susceptible as the rest of us. Time - her favourite preoccupation - is too valuable to be lost in a doom scroll. Speaking with Rachel Martin for NPR (the format is a bit annoying but the overall content is good*) on the anniversary of White Teeth turning 25, she reflects on how she’s spent the years since she wrote it.
I'm always hearing people on television saying, "No regrets! Sorry, not sorry!" I'm like, wow, dude, I am so sorry. I am filled with regret. It must be amazing never to feel sorry. So yeah, regret is something that I really understand. If only for the simple and selfish fact that you get one life, and I'm so hungry for a life that I could live it like 10 times. And once, it's a tough deal.
A major regret of hers is around the self-centeredness of her vocation, the isolationist nature of a writer’s life. Forced to confront her hermetic lifestyle during the pandemic - realising people don’t normally love being trapped at home - she’s learned to lean into the joy of doing rather than just observing, of being out in the world and participating.
A recent article in the Atlantic entitled, The “Ultimate German Philosophy for a Happier Life” supports the theory that happiness cannot be found solely in self satisfaction or a sense of personal morality but instead through contributing to civil society. Less individualism, more community. Not a radical concept but at this moment a valuable reminder.
*Zadie’s first solution to staving off depression is a dry martini - not exactly doctor approved but I like her style.
I’m still thinking about The Years play, an adaptation of Annie Ernaux’s Noble prize winning memoir. I saw it last week and it very much lived up to the hype - fainting audience member and all.
Phases of Annie’s life are acted out by stage veterans Gina McKee, Deborah Findlay, Romola Garai and newer faces Anjli Mohindra and Harmony Rose-Bremner, who give powerful performances across the board. From 1941 through 2006 we are immersed in the journey of her sexual awakening, teaching career, marriage, children, divorce and reawakening, all set against seismic political and cultural shifts, with a musical soundtrack to define each era.
It is masterfully staged by Eline Arbo, who zooms in and out of a personal story to the world at large and back again. I found the much discussed abortion scene more devastating than shocking - an important part of both Annie’s and our collective history (a brilliant version of this is told in the 2021 film “Happening”).
I was wowed by the whole thing and deeply moved. A span of 65 years in two hours, no better example of a woman containing multitudes.
Divorce Parties in Mauritania
Tangentially related but in the vein of shedding stigma I thought of this NYT article from 2023, on how divorce is celebrated in Mauritania. A joyous reframing of something which is viewed so negatively in many societies - here the talk is not of failure but of new possibilities. How refreshing that a woman can start over again and again without any diminishment to her perceived worth.
Danielle McKinney at TEFAF
Not long after pivoting from photography to painting in 2020 Danielle McKinney became a rising star of the art world, her “Ladies in Repose” gaining a faithful following through her posting on Instagram. Five years on she’s hugely in demand, having sold original works priced in the $100,000’s and a Dior collaboration under her belt.
This week she’s going to be represented by Marianne Boesky Gallery at TEFAF Maastricht, the premier international art fair for collectors. The nine piece collection which is inspired by Edward Hopper will be exhibited alongside some of his paintings. From an experiment during lockdown to having her art hang next to 20th century and Old Dutch Masters - what a thrill.
Messy Hair at Prada
The collaboration between Raf Simons and Miuccia Prada as co-creative directors continues to be a match made in fashion heaven, Raf bringing a love of bold colour combinations and pared-down, oversized proportion to Miuccia’s lady-like signature. The Fall/Winter 2025 show challenged conventional ideas of femininity, what CR Fashion Book called “a conversation between refinement and rawness”. What had everyone buzzing the most was the styling - “dragged through a hedge backwards” hair. As a person who doesn’t know how to use a brush, I felt seen.
Reservoir Bitches
I burned through “Reservoir Bitches”, a new book by Mexican writer Dahlia de La Cerda which has been long listed for the International Booker Prize.
The thirteen intertwined short stories are narrated in the first person by women of varied backgrounds and circumstances - the daughter of a drug lord, a teen mother, a socialite and a spinster, all who face the same hardship of rallying against the everyday violence of life in Mexico. Each story is full of verve and anger and a wickedly dark sense of humour. La Cerda’s casual, blunt writing style serves to reiterate the commonplace threat in her home country. It’s extremely powerful, with an excellent translation by Heather Cleary and Julia Sanches.
Some of the characters are better realised than others, with the best of the bunch “La Huesera” saved for the end. A gut punch but also very funny at times - I loved it.
Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown
In keeping with this newsletter’s unintentional but convenient theme of female narrative I have to recommend the 1989 film “Women on the Verge of a Nervous Breakdown” by Pedro Almodovar who has spent his career adeptly portraying complicated women.
This outrageous melodramatic farce centers on the plight of Pepa, who is desperately trying to find out why her partner Ivan has left her. A chaotic 48 hours in this pursuit sees her colliding with a host of mad characters, somehow more interconnected than they thought. All you really need to know is - don’t drink the gazpacho.
One of his earlier films, it’s a great showcase for his signature colour drenched and eclectic set and costume design. The Moka pot earrings alone deserve to be seen!
